I was sort of a loner here but, I happened to befriend a girl from North Carolina. She was cool. We became friends just by sitting together at practice. She was starting to become a person that I could actually confide in but, I didn’t tell her about Eight. I just preferred to keep things private. It was easier that way. It was going on three months since I told Eight that he was the one I had a little crush on but, getting to know him without everyone knowing wasn’t easy. I didn’t want anyone to know I had a thing for him because my privacy had already been violated before I even made it to the school. It wasn’t going to be an easy task because Eight was a social butterfly. He knew everyone and everyone knew him. He was just that type of guy. Fun, easy to talk to, and a loyal friend.
“Before transferring here you promised no friendships and no getting emotionally invested with anyone. Just class, practice, graduate, and leave. That was the deal. Now look at you.” I said to myself.
Something in me wanted to play this out to see what might happen. You never know what the future may bring. He might be the one. Neither of us had declared that this was a relationship. He was ready to make things “official” but, I was still very reserved. Opening up to him wasn’t something that came easy for me but, I was trying. There was nothing wrong with him. Being reserved with my feelings was a defense mechanism.
Thanksgiving break was coming up and there was talk about a party before everyone left. I was encouraged to go by my new friend so I could mingle with the people that I saw on a daily basis. After all, I couldn’t avoid them forever. Going to the party couldn’t hurt ? I would just stand in the corner and pretend to drink a cup of whatever was handed to me. Not expecting to socialize very much, I just threw something random on and headed to the party with my new found friend.
To my surprise the party was cool. It wasn’t what I was use to back home or where I transferred from but, it was cool. Everyone was having a good time and the drama was kept to a minimum. I stood in the corner letting the light from my phone illuminate my face as I kept myself occupied on something else other than watching people dance. Then he walked over.
“You look lonely and bored.” He yelled over the music.
“Hardly.” I replied.
He gave me a look that my answer wasn’t convincing so, he decided to chill in the corner with me. This would have been an ideal time to have a great conversation but, that was impossible to do over the intense sound of music blaring from the speakers. Instead we exchanged glances and rocked to the music. Then out of nowhere, he kissed me. It completely caught me off guard. I mean , it wasn’t the first time we’ve kissed but, it was the first time we showed that we even knew each other outside of saying hello in passing.
After finding out that I was into him, we made an agreement to act like we didn’t know each other on a personal level to keep people out of our business. We both knew that the large group of people we shared a space with on a daily basis was filled with a lot of drama that neither of us wanted to be associated with. I stood there for a moment trying to process what just happened. I didn’t want to scream over the music so, I pulled out my phone to text him.
Then he kissed me again. I took a quick second to survey the room and he was right. It seemed like everyone was too drunk to even realize what was going on around them. We spent the rest of the night chilling in the corner exchanging glances.
The party was coming to an end and it was time to go our separate ways. I caught a ride with someone else. You could consider her a big sister figure because she was always looking out for everyone. Instead of getting dropped off at my dorm. I ended up packed in a car with several people I didn’t know on my way to a local food spot that reminded me of a Coney Island back home. I was keeping it chill but, everyone was interested in getting to know why I transferred and what I was all about. I kept the conversation basic and short, then he walked in with his brothers. He looked at me and smiled. All I could do was smile back and laugh at the fact that everyone was clueless about him and I. He sat with his people and I sat with mine. Every now and then I would catch him looking my way. Maybe coming to the party wasn’t a bad idea. After all, I did get to see him.
The ride back to campus was quiet. Everyone fell asleep in the car from the mix of alcohol and food. I was playing back the events from the night and realizing that I actually did have a good time. Maybe I could be a little more social. Then out of nowhere the girl that was always looking out for everyone said,
“I saw ya’ll in the corner.”
“Saw who ?” I replied trying to play it off.
She gave me that you know who look. Well, our cover had been blown. I Immediately started preparing myself mentally for the extra BS that could come with him and I becoming a “thing” that we hadn’t even made a “thing” yet. He came with a lot that I wasn’t sure I was ready for. He was very social and in an organization on campus. It would be almost impossible to have a low-key relationship with him. All I could do was sigh.
“He’s my brother. Ya’ll secret is safe with me.” She said.
To be continued.